Dont be a n00b ..

Linux Install

2010-09-08T09:43:00.002+05:30

Friend - Hey! I just downloaded the Linux ISO... but i cant find the setup file to install the software.

Me - :| :| :| :|

Google Wave

2009-10-30T11:06:00.003+05:30

Everyone was talking about Google Wave and i didnt hav an account, and i desperately needed one.

Me: Hey, Do you use Wave, or anyone of ur friend who uses it? I need an invite.

Friend: ???? What ???? Bajaj Wave ???

X(

2009-05-31T14:37:00.002+05:30

As i said before that i flunked bec of 'Geometry and Calculus', I now declere that ive passed that subject and now ive enetred the Last Year...

yes !! yes !! yes !!!

2009-05-30T23:14:00.003+05:30

anupam had promised that he will let us all know about his results in his introduction .. he may have forgotten it ..but here it is ...
anupam,nirzar and 'yours truly' were being forced to and tortured by the University to learn calculus and geometry for over 2 years now...
and finally all of us have cleared the mess of a subject called M3 ... i hate m3 ..we all do .. :D
and we are all going to the final year and the final step towards NIRVANA ...towards becoming a Computer Graduate finally.
yay !!! this calls for a 'get-frunk-as-a-duck' kinda party ...what say ? anupam,nirzar are u guys reading this ??

Best OS

2009-05-30T21:08:00.002+05:30

I just started my PC and then started Linux.....

Friend : Is that the linux..?
Me : YES
Friend : Ohh... one question.. Which the best operating system in India??

x(
?????????????? :((

All Songs

2009-05-27T18:54:00.003+05:30

ME: I need all the songs that u have on ur PC...
Friend: OK i'll give them

---few days---

Friend: Take this, It has all the songs...

What he gave was....... songs.m3u

x(

Windows or Linux

2009-05-27T18:46:00.003+05:30

OK, this is my friend who has topped the university examinations in the First Year of Graduation...

ME: You are studying computer science, and still you dont own a computer...
Friend: yeah!, im going to get it once I get into the last year of graduation...
Me: OK!
Friend: Which one should i buy ?? The one with Windows or the one with Linux

x(

OS

2009-05-23T14:32:00.001+05:30

Friend : HELP HELP... my computer doesnt work(some stupid problem)
ME: OK, dont panic. First tell me what operating system do u use... XP or Vista
Friend : ummmm LG...

x(

I dont know why people think the manufacturer of the monitor is the most important thing in a PC

Torrent

2009-05-23T13:57:00.001+05:30

Everyone wants to know how the hell one downloads a movie,
I spent 30 minutes teaching a frined about torrents, peers, seeds, torrent client, .torrent file...
after the tution he wnt home and called me..

Friend: There is no movie in the download section of www.utorrent.com

x(

whats your speed ..

2009-05-23T13:31:00.003+05:30

This happened when every kid wanted unlimited internet so they could download movies and 'be cool' ...now one of my friends got a new pc with an internet connection and he was trying to be a smart ass about his new pc so I asked him "Whats the speed of Net connection ?" ..he said 2.6 Ghz ....
after that all I could say was OK .. :P

get the newbie

2009-05-22T23:03:00.000+05:30

Compiler & monitor

2009-05-22T22:20:00.003+05:30

My friend ( to teacher): Mam this turbo c compiler sucks. my linux system calls dont work here.

Teacher: wait i know how to fix that, i will change the monitor.

this is not fictional. happened at VIT

Ah well, we're not as computer literate as you

2009-05-22T22:11:00.006+05:30

I used to work in an international technical support center...
we used to get calls from US based customers about their internet queries ..
once i got a call where the customer had switched off her modem ..
and i asked her to power on the modem ..it worked and she was back OL
after that :

Customer: "How did you do that???"
Me: "I just switched the power on."
Customer: "Ah well, we're not as computer literate as you."

?? bloody hell .. xD

Too costly

2009-05-22T22:06:00.003+05:30

The first one... :))

Friend: My pc takes a lot of time to start up.
ME: U need to upgrade your pcs RAM, say by 1GB
-
-----few days pass-----
-
Friend: Its still the same.
ME : Did u buy the 1 GB ram
Friend: No thats too costly, but i deleted many songs

x(

my intro

2009-05-22T21:03:00.003+05:30

hi its nirzar,
i was very bad at LOTUS in 6th grade,failed once.
then my parents got me my PC
(which is now on my loft and most of the motherboard is torn apart to fetch the working components inhumanly, that reminds me, gimmie back my USB ports anupam.)
latest P3 with 128 mb ram and 80 gig of hdd. i didnt know how i was gonna fill that up that time. now my 1200 gig seems short. i know u just remembered that quote of 640K of bill gates in ur cheesy lame ass power point presentation.

I wasnt good at it that time. once i transfered .ico files of my favorite games in a floppy from friends computer.I distinctly remember it was NFS,Vcop2 and Motocross. i also remember saying "this is the happiest day of my life" when i created my first GIF image in Macromedia Flash 4., it was creepy but atleast moving.
days passed by and my addiction..ne..my attraction started growing. started doing some small animations in Flash and was obsessed with Winamp skin making in MS Paint (i still use it)

ok lets just skip the middle.. i am professional web developer now (heyy... i get paid, so i can professional)
Have done some neat work so far.
you can check out my website http://realcubes.com

heres some advice for you (n00b) ppl. (the ones who are actually interested in computers but cant find their way around, cause i am sick and tired of all your stupid questions, well they are insanely humorous so i can get along )

1. PLEASE READ what does it say on screen.
most of you say "it gave some error, then something happened and then again something happened" - WTF there is no such thing. you can always find atleast a single string attached to ANY error.
check ur error log in Control Panel -> Administrative Tools -> Event viewer

2. Google,Forums and Blogs are your best friends on the internet.
they have answers to nearly everything. i mean EVERYTHING.
people ask me "how to convert mp3 into wav"
after telling you how did i find the solution, you again ask "how to convert mp3 into amr"
same way stupid!!

got alot of these will share with you later...

signing off
nirzar

introduction

2009-05-22T20:55:00.005+05:30

Who am i: A guy who wastes most of the time of most of the days hatching eggs sitting in the chair in front of a monitor which has a rectangular box to its side and a fan in it, some electronic stuff, and which has something called as an OS.

And it happens that the fan, electronic stuff and the OS become my best friends, and everyone wants to know about them.

So the non-friends always come to me asking where they live, their phone number, their hobbies, their memory, their speed etc. etc.

The thing is ,I do want to tell them about my best friends, i want them to be everyones best friends, but they dont understand about them, they ask wrong questions, that makes me AAARRRGGGHHH !!!! so this blog \m/

So actually who am I: Iam a computer science student, flunked one year of graduation cos they made me learn calculus, and may be that will happen again (wrt 22/05/09) result will be out on 30/05/09 (will update abt me being flunked or not).

I got my first PC when I was 11, from that day im addicted to it, according to my sister I suffer from a disease "HYPER-COMPUTING SYNDROME" which im proud of.
Ive a scar on my forehead just like HARRY POTTER cos i tripped over a LAN cord.

I love experimenting , thats the best way to learn computers, I love troubleshooting, thats better than experimenting. I love knowing new technology,
I am a gadget freak... i love things with USB connectors :)) --- (I prefer the :)) smiley over :) smley cos the :) smiley is a bit gay)
That tells more abt me that im not gay,
This isnt going to get me any girls cos all girls are noobs who will never turn up to read this blog... :))

One more thing, im an Indian and i love my country....

Thats all...
will be back with some disastrous noob questions..

cya

Dhasu

Intro

2009-05-22T16:02:00.002+05:30

hey hi everyone ...
About me first:
I am a student of Computer Science.

I have always been inclined towards computers as a source of fun...I got my first computer when I was in SSC .. and I literally got addicted to computing. ..this resulted in me gaining an appreciable amount of knowledge about computers and also affected my academics adversely..

going on forward as i progressed through my academic years in junior colleges and colleges, I came across some really good friends who shared my liking for computers ....these people helped me improve my knowledge a lot.
I dont say that I know absolutely everything about computers , I cannot say that because learning is a life time process ... but I wont mind calling myself and my friends technically sound people.
Being technically sound , me and my friends,we have found ourselves in a position where people come and ask us for help regarding the simplest most of the issues about their computers..be it a hardware problem,some thing gone crazy with windows ..be it any problem ..they come to us ..and we do help them out with their problems ..and now

Straight to the Point:

Ok so we cut out all the unimportant things and get straight to the point ..
Q.>
"what the heck is this blog about ? "
A.> Like i said , we have helped many of our friends out of annoyingly simple situations( as well as some real kick-ass ones also ..) but while solving most of them.. .we came across embarassingly stupid n00b questions ..questions which left us ROTFL ..this blog is about such questions ... very soon my friends Dhasu and nZz will join in & we will share our experiences with you ... and MIND YOU !!! this blog is only for techies ..n00bs will not be entertained ... funny situations will not be explained ..and techies dont need any explanation ..they'll find it amusing anyways ..so if you need explanation ..Please 'Dont be a n00b'

signing out ..
ciao.

oh and i forgot to mention ...we may sound inhuman,self-obsessed,g33ks but you know what
if u have a problem ..share it ..we'll try and help ya all.